I realized something this weekend.

1) I'm bound to at least four more years of school once I graduate next May.
I do not have the option to just stop here. You can't do anything with a bachelor's degree in communication disorders, besides what you could do with any other generic 4-year degree. In order to be able to pay back my copious amounts of loans, I'm going to have to at least have my AuD. PhD is optional.

2) If I do my "dream plan" and wait to find a mate until I find my "dream job" in my "dream location," I will be 28 before I start seriously dating.
Not that that's altogether out of the 'dating zone,' but really? I don't want to wait until I'm 28 to START looking for my future husband. But at the same time, I don't want to meet my future husband in Idaho and be stuck here forever. I've never thought about this side of the story before, and it's very depressing. David, my friend who is in the same program, already found the love of his life, and she's willing to go wherever he goes. Unfortunately, it's usually the girl who's expected to be that way. What if I don't want to be the one following? What if I want to move to Germany and my significant other would need to join me? I don't want to set myself up for heartache that way, but I also don't want to be alone for the rest of my life.

I'm done thinking about this, I'm getting really depressed.

Bad News

This is a partial transcript of an email I recently received from Erin Maloff, a student at Vanderbilt University.

Hi Ashley,

It sounds like you are interested in the audiology field (as opposed to neuroscience or engineering), so pursuing a doctoral degree in this area makes sense. I would strongly encourage you to consider applying for a program that combines the AuD and PhD degrees for a couple of reasons. First, you will gain a much better sense of the issues and areas of research within the field if you have some clinical experience. Even if you don't have any interest in seeing patients in the clinic, having some clinical experience will help you to develop ideas and frame out designs for projects much better. Second, holding both degrees will make you much more marketable when it comes time to find a job. Most of the jobs and/or post-doc positions I found in the field of audiology clearly stated that it was preferable to have some clinical experience and to hold a state license to practice (this is not always the case for other fields like neuroscience). One person I interviewed with just recently for a job in a university told me that doing research in her lab would be much more difficult for someone who did not have any clinical experience. Many audiology professors I interviewed with for jobs in university settings have had some sort of clinical experience. You mentioned a potential interest in working for hearing aid or cochlear implant companies. I have several friends with Ph.D. degrees who work for these type of companies and I know that they were hired in part because of the clinical experience they had before they started working toward their PhDs, even though they were hired for primarily research-based positions.

THIS DOES NOT SIT WELL.
Essentially, what this means is that New Zealand is out of the question unless I can work it in during my internship year. The program at UCanterbury only has a Master's in audiology because that's the requirement for certification there. The requirement here is a four-year AuD. In order to pay back the copious amount of student loans I'll have upon my graduation, I'm going to need lots of credentials on my side.

So, with tears in my eyes, I begin my search for another program.
My top choices are University of Iowa, Vanderbilt, and University of Texas at Dallas.

Quick Semester Update

I ended up dropping Planets and Astrobiology, the 4-credit physical science class I didn't need. I'm glad I did, too, because BSU ended up giving me a lot of trouble this semester and it's less than a week old! They never sent my transcript over, so ISU thought I was still on academic probation. Got it all worked out, though, thankfully!

I was worried about my classes this semester, since last semester was such a drag, but they've been fantastic so far! I am really looking forward to class every day, and it's maintaining my motivation to read more research articles. Both are very positive outcomes!

My father has presented me with a challenge: find five first-hand anecdotes of people who accomplished their PhD and ask them the following questions...

1. How did you finance your postgraduate education?
2. How much student-loan debt did you have upon graduation?
3. What was your salary in your first job after graduation?
4. How long did it take to pay off your loans?

We'll see how it all works out. I'm hoping positively. :)

The Pros and Cons of University of Canterbury

As they currently stand. :)

This Semester's Schedule

Is up for debate.
I have 19 credits at present, but 4 are unnecessary and happen to be in the worst time-block possible (making it impossible for me to work in the evening and also pushing my sleep cycle later). Unfortunately, I really enjoyed Stars and Cosmology last semester and this is the second section. I was always happy to have the unrelated class break up my day, but I'm not sure I want to suffer through 19 credits to do it. I have to think about my cumulative GPA if I'm really going to do this New Zealand thing.

The Beginning of the List

Here's what I have at this time.

° Mission Statement: "There is no reason you shouldn't be able to pass this class." But not necessarily because the tests are easy or the material is basic.
° Create simple slides (less than 3 elements per slide)
° TEXTBOOK OPTIONAL. All pertinent information will be in lectures or the occasional reading, to be uploaded or found online (no more than 15 pages if possible).
° Tests and quizzes will be strictly lecture-oriented.
° Class input encouraged whenever discussion would be beneficial.
° Offer optional quizzes after each chapter/section for extra credit.
° Organize class material with a building-block paradigm.
° Provide plenty of interesting, extra-curricular (optional) links/activities to enhance understanding or interest in the topic.
° NO HOMEWORK. Minimal paper-writing.
° Explore the idea of pod-casting lectures, and whether it would enhance understanding or simply cause low or nonexistent attendance. Maybe offer by specific request.

Some Catch-Up

I started this as a blog on my Myspace page, but since I never log on there anymore, I figured it'd be best to have it in its own medium. As far as purpose is concerned, I will be using this blog to update myself. More importantly, it will keep track of my train of thought at each stage of my graduate school saga. That's where the title came from.

And.... begin!